Paschal Reflections in the American Midwest

Growing up, my grandmother always said that Holy Week is the greatest apologetic for Orthodoxy. “The beauty and truth of Holy Orthodoxy is revealed in our many Holy Week services,” she said.

I was roughly 16 years old when Holy Thursday clicked for me. As an acolyte, I was typically more concerned with making sure my knees didn’t lock out during the 12 Gospel readings and that I was keeping up with what needed to be done to make sure the service went off without a hitch. But, that year, I noticed two old ladies in my parish crying in the front row during the procession with the Cross. It finally hit me, just as the hymnography of the Church constantly states, that the Crucifixion of Christ was happening “today.” Ever since then, Holy Thursday has always been the gut punch, and quite an emotional day for me. 

This year was my wife’s first Holy Week as an Orthodox Christian. Last year, running the gauntlet of Holy Week services is what convinced her that Orthodoxy is the One True Church. This year, my wife bawled her eyes out on Holy Thursday. I thought I appreciated it, but as always, I was shown just how far I have to go in the spiritual life. I have been blessed with the gift of tears several times, but never as much as my wife was this Holy Week. I was reminded of something I’d read in the Sayings of the Desert Fathers: 

“Abba Isaac said: 'Once I was sitting with Abba Poemen, and I saw that he was in an ecstasy; and since I used to speak very openly with him, I made a prostration before him and asked him, ‘Tell me, where were you?’ And he did not want to tell me. But when I pressed him, he replied: ‘My thoughts were with St. Mary the Mother of God, as she stood and wept at the Cross of the Saviour; and I wish that I could always weep as much as she wept then.’” 

It was a great blessing to see all of these events come to life for my wife. As someone who was baptized as an infant, Orthodoxy has always been a part of me, and definitely something I’ve taken for granted. Witnessing my wife see all of these events come to life in a way they never did in her Lutheran church growing up reminded me of what a blessing it is to be an Orthodox Christian. 

We also had several inquirers make the journey of Holy Week with us this year. It is incredible the amount of people who are spiritually starved and finding true food in our parishes across the nation. Although I did remind them that, in a sense, they were experiencing our “Super Bowl” and things won’t be as ramped up as they have been recently, they seem completely won over. They also regularly come to the Divine Liturgy, services during the week, and ask questions of parishioners and our priest, and they each have a good head on their respective shoulders. God willing, we will have some strong additions to our parish in the coming months and years. 

Sometimes it can be easy to ask, “Why us? Why me?” I often find myself doing it in situations that feel like blessings and situations that feel like curses. 

I’m learning more and more how much easier it is to say, “Thank you, Lord. Thy will be done.” 

Christ is Risen! Χριστὸς Ανέστη! 

Aaron Hickman is an Orthodox Christian living in Omaha, NE, and a member of the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese (GOARCH). He has been an avid writer since college and serves as the editor for a number of syndicated local newspapers in the Upper Midwest.

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