Just Be Normal
“There such a thing as a true American: an honest, forthright, normal person for whom Holy Orthodoxy is quite natural; and the harvest of these true Americans is only beginning.”
— Fr. Seraphim Rose
As some of you may know, Ben Dixon (our editor-in-chief) and I recently started a podcast. It’s called Midnight Office, and it’s available wherever fine podcasts are streamed, including YouTube.
Ben and I are both catechists at our respective parishes. We’re also converts to Orthodoxy ourselves. So, our first couple of episodes have focused mainly on the conversion process. We talk about the advice we give to inquirers and catechumens. Some of that advice comes from things we’ve been told by our priests or read in books or books. Most of it, though, we learned from trial and error.
It’s funny. Ben and I discovered that the main point we try to impress on our catechumens is this: Just be normal.
Why is that? Well, because new converts often struggle with an excess of zeal. Or, rather, their zeal is misdirected.
You know what I mean. As soon as someone decides to become Orthodox, he’ll grow his hair and beard out. He’ll get a bunch of black hoodies with skulls with slogans like “Death to the World.” He’ll wear a huge, three-barred cross and a prayer rope around their wrist. He’ll accumulate stacks of books by the Church Fathers, Fr. Seraphim Rose, and the like. He’ll buy icon after icon after icon.
And hey, I’m guilty of all that! No judgment here. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with long hair and beards (clearly!). The question is whether these external things really correspond to a deep, inner transformation. You own fifteen prayer books… but do you say your prayer rule every morning and night? You wear a “Death to the World” hoodie… but are you still watching porn? Ben talks about the inquirers who stand in the middle of the temple, fingering their 300-knot prayer rope through the whole Liturgy… but then can’t get out of the way during the Great Entrance.
Then there’s the deadliest trap: pride. I don’t have to tell any of you that the Orthodox are developing a reputation for being toxic on the Internet. This is way overblown, in my opinion. But we can’t pretend the problem doesn’t exist. New converts to Orthodoxy are most definitely tempted to flaunt their new faith on social media. That often includes arguing with Protestants, Catholics, etc. In some rare instances, that “overzealousness” spills over into real life; you get new converts trying to debate their friends, spouses, and even parents into accepting their new faith.
Most of the time, we’re less than charitable in these exchanges. Fr. Seraphim Rose had plenty to say about this:
• “No matter how ‘right’ you may be on various points, you must be diplomatic also. The first and important thing is not ‘rightness’ at all, but Christian love and harmony. Most ‘crazy converts’ have been ‘right’ in the criticisms that led to their downfall; but they were lacking in Christian love and charity and so went off the deep end,
• “Like Judas, everyone of us has passions in his heart. Let us therefore look at them. We can be caught with love for neatness, with love for correctness, with love for a sense of beauty: any of our little faults which we cling to can be a thing that the devil can catch us with, and then we can begin to think logically on the basis of that passion. From that logical process of thinking we can betray Christ, unless we watch over ourselves and begin to realize that we are filled with passions, that each one of us is potentially a Judas.”
• “We know many converts who grasp at ‘correctness’ like a baby’s bottle, and I think they could save their souls better by being a little ‘incorrect’ but humbler.”
• “Super-correctness (and not always in the obvious forms mentioned above) is a big temptation for Orthodox people of these latter times, when ‘the love of many grows cold’.”
Again, I’m not here to judge anyone. I won’t tell you how to live. But I will say this: one thing that really helped me come out of my super-correct phase was moving away from the externals. I stopped wearing my hundred-knot prayer rope and bought a 33-knot bracelet instead. I put away the big, metal cross and my shirt with the Byzantine eagle; I started wearing my baptismal cross under my clothes and use my Orthobro swag as pajamas.
That’s not to say everyone should emulate me. God forbid! But when I put away the externals, I got more serious about the internals. Then I started to understand why the Early Christians didn’t have any special jewelry or clothes to set themselves apart. It’s not because they were afraid of persecution. It’s because the Lord gave them very specific instructions on how to identify themselves. “By this all will know that you are My disciples,” He said, “if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).
That’s what we mean when we say, “Just be normal.” Your Faith should be evident, not from what you wear or even what you say, but by how you act. St. Paul says, “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23). Those are the marks of a true Orthodox Christian.
As I was writing this, I came across a certain passage in Fr. Seraphim Rose’s Life and Works. Fr. Seraphim talks about meeting the son of a ROROR deacon. This young man belongs to the parish which, shortly after their meeting, would join the Panteleimonite schism.
These schismatic tendencies are already evident in the parish. Fr. Seraphim writes that the deacon’s son is “troubled by the ‘super-correct’ tendency in the parish. The young people here have a very normal view of these things—a good sign.”
So, don’t take it from me. Take it from Fr. Seraphim Rose:
Just be normal.
