Fr. Seraphim Rose: Advice to 'Crazy Converts'
Whenever he wrote to his spiritual children—especially recent converts—Fr. Seraphim always urged them to seek the spirit of humility and tenderness.
The Orthodox thinker Paul Kingsnoth called Fr. Seraphim Rose “the patron saint of lost Americans.” He is, for many of us, the archetypal convert. Born in San Diego in the year 1934, Eugene Dennis Rose was a deeply modern man. He gave himself over to modern ideas, modern trends, modern vices. Still, his heart was restless. Rose’s heart found its rest in the world’s one safe harbor: the Orthodox Church.
Back then, Orthodoxy was seen as an “ethnic” religion. Fr. Seraphim did more than anyone to change that impression. He proved to the world that Orthodoxy is not merely a strange, “Eastern” variant of Catholicism or Anglicanism: it is the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church.
Many in the “East” needed to re-learn this lesson, too. That's why Fr. Seraphim’s cult has spread so quickly in the Old Country. He is a zealot, in the best sense of the word. Countless men and women from traditional Orthodox lands have returned to the Faith thanks to Fr. Seraphim. His zeal has set their hearts on fire. This ancient Beauty has become new to them, having seen Her through this convert's eyes.
Fr. Seraphim was a brilliant philosopher, theologian, and social critic. He was a translator, a hagiographer, and a historian. He was an ascetic, an evangelist, and a spiritual father. Few modern voices in Holy Orthodoxy have more to teach us about how to live as Orthodox Christians in the world today than Fr. Seraphim Rose.
For the last couple of years, it’s been my habit to read Fr. Seraphim’s Life and Works (which is worth the price of a Kindle!) in bed before I fall asleep. One thing has struck me repeatedly: Fr. Seraphim’s zeal for the Faith was always tempered with a love for, and gentleness towards, his neighbor. Actually, that’s not quite right. It suggests that zeal and charity are somehow in conflict. We should say, rather, that Fr. Seraphim’s zeal manifested itself as love and gentleness towards his neighbor.
Whenever he wrote to his spiritual children—especially recent converts—he always urged them to seek the spirit of humility and tenderness.
For example, in chapter 84, (“Pastoral Guidance”), we read the following advice he gave to a catechumen:
As you prepare for Baptism, I would give you several words of advice:
1. Don’t allow yourself to get stuck on the outward aspect of Orthodoxy—whether the splendid Church services (the “high church” to which you were drawn as a child), the outward discipline (fasts, prostrations, etc.), being “correct” according to the canons, etc. All these things are good and helpful, but if one overemphasizes them one will enter into troubles and trials. You are coming to Orthodoxy to receive Christ, and this you should never forget.
2. Don’t have a hypercritical attitude. By this I don’t mean to give up your intellect and discernment, but rather to place them in obedience to a believing heart (“heart” meaning not mere “feeling,” but something much deeper—the organ that knows God). Some converts, alas, think they are very “smart,” and they use Orthodoxy as a means for feeling superior to the non-Orthodox and sometimes even to Orthodox of other jurisdictions. Orthodox theology, of course, is much deeper and makes much better sense than the erroneous theologies of the modern West—but our basic attitude towards it must be one of humility and not pride. Converts who pride themselves on “knowing better” than Catholics and Protestants often end by “knowing better” than their own parish priest, bishop, and finally the Fathers and the whole Church!
3. Remember that your survival as an Orthodox Christian will depend very much on your contact with the living tradition of Orthodoxy. This is something you won’t get in books and it can’t be defined for you. If your attitude is humble and without hypercriticism, if you place Christ first in your heart, and try to lead a normal life according to Orthodox discipline and practice — you will obtain this contact. Alas, most Orthodox jurisdictions today... are losing this contact out of simple worldliness. But there is also a temptation on the “right side” which proceeds from the same hypercriticism I just mentioned. The traditionalist (Old Calendar) Church in Greece today is in chaos because of this, one jurisdiction fighting and anathematizing another over “canonical correctness” and losing sight of the whole tradition over hyper-fine points... You yourself have had enough experience in life to avoid these temptations, which are actually those of the young and inexperienced; but it is good to keep them in mind.
Likewise, in chapter 88 (“Converts”), Fr. Seraphim gives the following advice to a man who was unhappy with the liturgical standards at his mission parish:
Beware! No matter how “right” you may be on various points, you must be diplomatic also. The first and important thing is not “rightness” at all, but Christian love and harmony. Most “crazy converts” have been “right” in the criticisms that led to their downfall; but they were lacking in Christian love and charity and so went off the deep end, needlessly alienating people around them and finally finding themselves all alone in their rightness and self-righteousness. Don’t you follow them!...
The attitude toward the little mission which you reveal in your letter is a very dangerous one, both for you and others. I will tell it to you straight and pray that you have the courage to accept it and act on it before it is too late. The “zeal” you are showing for English services, congregational singing, etc., is not primarily zeal according to God, is not based on Christianity; it is, on the contrary, only stubborn self-will, a symptom of the “correctness disease” that plagues so many converts and leads straight to disaster. If you do not fight against this passion now (for it is a passion), the—mission is doomed, and you yourself will very likely lose your own faith and your own family. I have seen this “convert-pattern” in practice too often not to warn you about it.
You are still new to Orthodoxy, and yet you wish to teach those older in the Faith (and from the way you describe it, you are “teaching” them quite crudely, without the slightest tact or Christian charity). Plain common sense should tell you that this is no way to act; Christian love should make you ashamed of your behavior and anxious to learn more of basic Christianity before daring to teach anyone anything. I haven’t heard from anyone in the—area, but I can imagine how your behavior must offend and hurt them. There is nothing mysterious about the fact that you are alienating people; your behavior, as you have described it yourself, is exactly the kind that drives people away and causes fights in the Church. Don’t hide behind “English services” and “no-partitura” singing: these are only half-truths which your pride seizes on in order to avoid basic Christian humility and love.
Look for a moment at how it must seem to others: you couldn’t get along in the—parish and had to drop out; now, in your “own” parish, you drive people away. It simply cannot be that others are always to blame and you are always innocent; you must start correcting your own faults and living in peace with the Christians around you.
How do you do this? You begin by accepting certain basic Orthodox principles:
1. All questions regarding Church services (language, kind of singing, etc.) and behavior in church (including head coverage of women, etc.) are decided by the priest who serves. You are not to be a “policeman” who enforces “church laws” according to your understanding of them; it’s already clear that you are going to drive everybody away doing this, and in any case, people come to church hoping to escape the cold legalism of the world that surrounds us—have pity on them!
2. Realize that you are still a new convert and have much to learn, and are not to be a “teacher” of others, save in the sense that every Orthodox Christian is a source of edification (or the opposite) to others by his behavior. This edification is given first of all, of course, to one’s own family, and this is a place where, according to what you have told me, you are very weak.... You’ve indicated in earlier letters that you and your wife might just drift apart, that [your son] may not end up Orthodox—but how can a Christian husband and father realize such terrible things and not be filled with zeal to correct himself before these disasters happen? (For if these things do happen, you will be to blame: because you did not give your family an example of living Christianity to inspire and warm them, but only some kind of legalistic, soul-less “correctness” that only feeds the ego.)
3. Begin to humble yourself in your relations with others, to act towards them first of all with compassion and love; go out of your way to see things the way they see them and not give offense to their feelings. Cease to be an egotist and learn to live in peace with the Christians around you. This can’t be done overnight, but you can start.
4. Start studying seriously the ABC’s of Orthodox Christianity. Have you read Unseen Warfare recently?—that’s a good place to start....
I’ve said enough, perhaps more than you can digest at once. I do not call on you to “abandon all your ideas,” or to become a totally different man overnight. I only want you to start working harder on yourself and to be more compassionate to others, and to relax on trying to be so “correct.” This is not so impossible, and I think you will never find happiness and spiritual peace unless you do this.
Less than a year later, Fr. Seraphim’s worst fears came to pass: the man’s son left him. This is what Fr. Seraphim told him:
What can I say? Obviously I have failed you as a spiritual father, not communicating to you even the basic ABC’s of Christian spiritual life. In this past year you have gone from bad to worse, alienating even more than before, through your un-Christian behavior ... the Orthodox community, visiting priests, and even your own son—who is surely to a large extent what you have made him, apparently more unconsciously than consciously. The blame for all of this rests squarely upon your shoulders. You are not behaving in a Christian way to any of these people, and you seem totally unaware of the fact....
If you wish to be an Orthodox Christian you must begin now, from this very day and hour and minute, to love God and your fellow men. This means: not to act in an arbitrary or whimsical way with people, not just saying the first thing that enters your head, not picking fights or quarrels with people over anything, big or small, being constantly ready to ask forgiveness of them (and to ask it more than you think is necessary), to have compassion for them and fervently pray for them.... If you had such compassion for your own son, on a regular basis, he would not have left you. He loves you, in case you don’t know it....
If you still accept my authority as a spiritual father, I am giving you a different prayer rule: instead of the Jesus Prayer, say every night 100 prayers by the prayer-rope, with words something like this (or the equivalent in your own words): Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on my brother (name) ... going by name through all the people close to you, starting with your immediate family. With each petition make a bow (prostrations for members of your immediate family). Stop at 100 (repeating names if necessary), and let your last petition be for everyone. By this I want you to wake up and start loving your brothers and sisters, both of the household of faith and those without....
I make a prostration before you and beg your forgiveness for my many sins and failings towards you. May God forgive and have mercy on us all.... I assure you that, whatever your attitude may be towards me, mine towards you has not changed in the least.
By the prayers of our holy father Seraphim of Platina, may God illumine our hearts with the love of His Church!
