Why I Decided to Start Covering My Head
The conviction grew and I began to consider, “Why would I wear a head covering at the monastery and not to my home parish?” Shouldn’t I be honoring God in His house wherever it is located? Aren’t the presence of angels always part of our worship on earth? And what about all those icons I am reverencing? Every female saint that I honor for her spiritual strength, her boldness on earth and faithfulness to the Lord, is wearing a veil.
Wearing a scarf on my head during worship was not something I thought about when I became an Orthodox Christian, as it’s not a major part of the Antiochian tradition. I would wear one when visiting the monastery because it’s a required garment for their dress code, but outside of those visits, my scarf stayed in the closet.
For 17 years this was my pattern, but in 2023, an inner conviction began to grow about head coverings. It began when I visited Holy Trinity Orthodox Church in Lynchburg, VA, while I was in town for the weekend. It was the first time I had worshipped in a Western Rite parish. The Divine Liturgy was different in style and sound, but the Christ-centered structure, the warmth and hospitality of congregants, the same. Their tradition includes women wearing headscarves.
This was subtly pointed out by a charming basket filled with scarves by the door, with a handwritten note attached that read: “For any of the ladies who have forgotten their scarf.” I smiled at the kind way this was displayed, but also glad I knew ahead of time. Mine was already on.
As I watched young families coming in, smiling at the babies and acclimating to different sounds, I felt at ease right away. And somewhere along that beautiful hour, a bright thought fell into my soul that has remained—it seemed right to be wearing a head covering.
It felt right because it was humbling. And isn’t that exactly how we should approach worship—with a humble spirit, open to receiving the Word and Divine Mysteries of God?
St Paul says in I Corinthians 11 that women should cover their head when praying or prophesying and, mysteriously, that we should also do so “because of the angels.” I’ve read a few different opinions on the significance of the angels, but my favorite came from an inspired homily by Fr. Mousa at St. Mary’s Orthodox Church.
Fr. Mousa points out that in light of Holy Scripture, the response to the appearance of angels by men and women is decidedly different. Men fall down before them while women tend to converse with them. He posits that the angelic realm may have a certain awe of women. “There is a mystery about woman because through woman, everything is offered,” he writes; “the ability to give birth to life and her participation in this creative process is unique to her role… Whenever angels see a woman now, they say, That’s the kind that gave birth to God!”
St. Cyril of Alexandria (5th century) seems to support this unique perspective of the angels when he said, “The angels find it extremely hard to bear if this law [that women cover their heads] is disregarded.”
With every subsequent visit I made to Holy Cross Monastery, the conviction grew and I began to consider, “Why would I wear a head covering at the monastery and not to my home parish?” Shouldn’t I be honoring God in His house wherever it is located? Aren’t the presence of angels always part of our worship on earth?
And what about all those icons I am reverencing? Every female saint that I honor for her spiritual strength, her boldness on earth and faithfulness to the Lord, is wearing a veil.
After about three months of my growing conviction, I wanted to begin wearing a head covering at church. Now I faced a new dilemma—wouldn’t I appear conspicuous to my church family after all these years of not donning a scarf? I feared I would seem to be drawing attention to myself or, worse, that others would think I considered myself pious.
I sought the advice of my priest, Fr. Samuel, as he is a good shepherd of our parish and I knew he would guide me with wisdom. He listened to my thoughts, shared the traditions (little “t” ) of our Antiochian history and encouraged me to do what I felt led to do—that he would support my decision in either case. I was relieved.
Even though inwardly I felt a little uncomfortable at first, worrying what others might think of my new practice, it didn’t take long for my wearing a headscarf to feel very natural and proper. A serendipitous moment happened when I realized it also feels very feminine, as if I am honoring that beautiful nature of womanhood as God designed it. That’s no small thing for this gal who grew up as a “tomboy,” playing sports and spending time at the farm tending animals and getting my hands dirty.
Now, close to three years later, I love wearing a head scarf and began wearing it at home during prayer times as well. I don’t wear it because I think I am pious: I wear it because I know I’m proud. It is a tangible item to remind me daily to strive for humility, that chief among virtues.
This article first appeared at Reflections of a Spiritual Daughter. It is reprinted here with the author’s gracious permission.
